Hole in the Heart

One of my neighbors lost his sweet wife to cancer. I gave him my condolences, and he replied, “I have a hole in my heart.” I told him I would pray for him, and I did. Recently, I saw him outside and stopped to chat. I let him know I had been thinking about him. I asked him how the hole in his heart was. His reply shook me into a new reality. “It will always be there, but I must continue moving forward daily.”

We hear about or experience people losing loved ones. There are no words for the “holes” left in the hearts of families and friends.

Everyone grieves differently. We grieve for people we don’t know, and we grieve for the ones who are close to the deceased. Death is a part of our world.

September 11, 2001, at 8:14 a.m., is ingrained in my mind forever.

That morning, a volunteer mom came into my class and yelled, “Did you hear what happened?”  I walked over and asked her to keep her voice down. Shortly after she explained the outburst, the principal came on the intercom and told the teachers that T.V.s should not be on in the classrooms. Administrators instructed teachers to log into their computers via email for further instructions. Then, it started.

We are near one of the biggest airports in the world. Could that be a target? My husband worked near the Atlanta Airport, and I wanted to see if he knew about this. I took my class outside for a Brain Break and called him. There was no service. What? Could this be happening? We were so used to having instant access to others at any time.

We went back into the building and proceeded with our day. Teachers played tag, watching each other’s classes to run to the lounge to see the news. That was one of the longest days of my teaching career. During the students’ special classes, P.E., Music, and Art, the teachers stared in silence as they watched the repeat of planes crashing into the World Trade Center.

Questions began to fly. What? Is this real? Why? Who? Did I know someone working there? Once again, this life-changing event affected not only the people in these buildings but also their families, friends, and acquaintances—people who attended church, synagogue, school, parents of kids on the sports teams, neighbors, etc. No one would believe the impact this had on the United States of America.

Strangers were coming together to help one another. Firefighters, police officers, and all first responders became heroes, and more stories started to come. Last phone calls from offices and planes. Memories of the last time someone had seen Mr.or Ms. Smith. There were miracle stories, too, about how people who missed their flight were fortunate to be among the living. People had left the building minutes before the impact. Was this luck? I believe God blessed these survivors for a reason, and we may never know why, this side of heaven.

After September 11, 2001, and other tragedies and deaths, my takeaway is for us to realize that the holes left by death may get smaller, but they remain with each individual affected. I’m sending hugs and prayers to all of you.

Please feel free to share your experience with a “Hole in the Heart.”